


My Sweet Prince

by Lovely_Reira



Category: K (Anime)
Genre: I like hurting, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-08
Updated: 2018-05-08
Packaged: 2019-05-03 20:13:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14576757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lovely_Reira/pseuds/Lovely_Reira
Summary: A cold carriage, clothes that aren't his own with a dagger hidden beneath them, and an arbitrary schedule to keep to. What could go wrong?Everything, when Fushimi Saruhiko and Yata Misaki are involved.





	My Sweet Prince

It was admittedly a lovely night. The sky a deep blue, freckled by the light of the stars. The moon was partially covered by soft clouds, but it's light was still plenty to illuminate everything for the young man to see as he sat in the carriage. If it weren't for the bumpy road beneath the wheels and the fact that his foot had begun to fall asleep after having travelled so long without any kind of break, he might have considered that it was all a dream.

How could any of this be real as he headed towards a castle wearing the fanciest clothes he had ever seen in his life, his usually loose and messy hair brushed and styled to perfection and tied back with a blue ribbon? Saruhiko rubbed the black fabric of his jacket's sleeve. Cloaked in an array of blacks, silvers, and blues he felt a bit like a child playing dress-up. Though, he supposed most children could only dream of wearing such things, how that man had managed to get some was completely beyond him. With a click of his tongue, he decided that he was probably better off not knowing and that he didn't particularly care.

The black and silver mask he had been given had been put on long ago to prevent anyone from glimpsing the parts of his face that it would conceal. It was a little difficult to see things far away without the glasses that typically adorned his face, but he would make due. It wasn't as if his eyesight was all that atrocious after all.

'I only need to be able to see far enough to complete my mission,' he had told himself as he adjusted to having the edges of his usual clear cut world blurred.

Even with his vision impaired, he could make out the bright lights as they approached the castle, the sounds of music playing reaching his ears and nearly bringing a groan from his lips. There were many things that Fushimi Saruhiko hated; vegetables, that man, when one of his clothes would acquire a new rip and he'd have to sew it up. At the top of that list was practically everything that one would normally associate with a party.

Loud music that he didn't like, loud people that he didn't know, dancing, the expectations of socializing. All of it.

It wasn't as if he could just get in and out of there either. No. He had a specific time that he had to adhere to because it would be at least twice as bothersome if he didn't do it properly.

Midnight.

That was how long he had to wait. Just until midnight and then he could do what he had come here to do and leave, he thought as he brushed his hand against the dagger that was strapped to his side. Easy to pull out, but hard to notice. Perfect.

When the carriage finally rolled to a stop, he took the moment to stretch his legs and try to subtly kick his foot awake so that it wouldn't feel as if he were walking on pins and needles when he stepped out. The door beside him opened, revealing the short pudgy man who had driven him, offering him a small smile when he saw Saruhiko pause for a moment- no doubt mistaking his hesitation for nervousness rather than the quick run through of the plan that was truly happening in his head. Whatever. It didn't matter to him. He stood and exited the carriage, ignoring the hand that was offered to help him.

The eyes that fell on him made his skin crawl. He could feel the curiosity in their gazes and while he couldn't hear the words whispered, he was sure they were all speculations about him. It, thankfully, didn't last long as another carriage pulled up and someone apparently more interesting left it. Glancing over to see who, his eyes landed on a man clothed in white with two companions, a man and a woman. The woman was dressed as finely as him, though her dress was certainly more scandalous than any other woman arriving, leaving little of her chest to the imagination. The man was dressed nicely, but in a far simpler way and, from the sword at his waist, it was clear he was attending as a body guard rather than a party guest. He almost felt gratitude to the silver haired man that drew all attention from himself as he passed by him, heading up the stairs with the woman clinging to his arm and the dark haired knight who walked slightly behind.

No one seemed to spare him another glance after that as he walked up the staircase, entering through the excessively large doors- seriously, were they expecting a couple of giants to fall from the sky and visit the castle one day?

The party was exactly as one might have expected a party to look. Nothing too spectacular, in all honesty. Lots of people dressed in their finest, eating foods that he couldn't name and drinking whilst they laughed and danced along the white marble floor to the sound of music being played from somewhere. It was just a little bit too loud to talk at a natural volume meaning that everyone was speaking louder than they typically would have.

On the far end of the hall were two small staircases that led to two thrones in the middle. One was completely empty while the other had one too many people in it. As he got closer, he could begin to properly see the expressions of a young girl in a dark red dress and mask with startling white hair perched on the lap of an older man with red hair who looked as if he wanted to be here even less than Saruhiko- if that was humanly possible- leaning against the arm of the throne. There was another man beside him who seemed much more at ease with the blithe atmosphere.

The girl's eyes opened suddenly, her eyes as crimson as the dress that she wore, and seemed to meet his gaze with ease, a tiny frown appearing on her lips. Though that wasn't possible. There were far too many people for her to have been able to notice him, he was sure. It only seemed that way because he was looking at her.

Looking away from her, he turned his attention to the rest of the guests that mingled around him. He grabbed a flute of champagne when a man with a platter of them passed by him, sipping at the bubbly liquid to seem more natural and ease any nerves that being in such an environment would cause.

Saruhiko naturally drifted towards the side of the room, leaning his back against the wall as he scanned the crowd. It hadn't been too bad before, but it was beginning to get annoying trying to pick out his intended target amongst the masked blobs. He let out a huff and closed his eyes to rest them for a few moments, rubbing at the bridge of his nose with the fingers of his free hand.

"Are you alright?"

He opened his eyes, staring down at the shorter man who was a bit too close for comfort. Though, he suspected from the fact that he hadn't had to practically yell to get Saruhiko's attention that this was intentional and not just a severe lack of regard for one's personal space. Or perhaps, it was a little of both.

"Fine. It's just a little noisy in here."

Saruhiko allowed his eyes to wander over him, starting from his freshly polished black shoes up past his white trousers to his equally white jacket, adorned with red detailing and golden accents in the form of tassels and meticulously polished buttons, it fit him snugly, showing off his thin yet muscular build. His eyes trailed slowly up even further to his lips which were parted ever so slightly and a little shiny from his tongue darting out to wet them, a golden mask covered the upper half of his face, worried hazel eyes behind it, framed by thick black lashes. Finally to the wild mess of his red hair. It looked like it would be soft to the touch. He wondered how long had been spent trying to tame it before whatever unlucky chambermaid who had been tasked with it gave up. At his words, his worried expression shifted to one of understanding.

"Ah, I know what you mean. With everyone talking and all the music it can get a little overwhelming sometimes. Once you kind of get into the swing of things, it can be really fun though!" He told him, his eyes sparkling.

Saruhiko merely hummed softly, an ambiguous sound that neither agreed or disagreed with his sentiment. He doubted a place like this would ever be fun to him.

The man continued on talking to him, not discouraged in the slightest by his less than conversational answer. "Have you been to one of these before? I don't think I've ever seen you at one."

"Isn't that the point of wearing masks. So you can't recognize the wearer? Besides, I'm not the kind of person that would typically catch the attention of a prince," he drawled, avoiding the question smoothly.

"Even with a mask, I definitely would have remembered meeting you," Yata insisted.

"Such a bold statement. Are you flirting with me, my prince?" He asked, his tone flat even as he quirked a single eyebrow up in question.

A small smirk pulled momentarily at his lips as the prince flushed red. "Th-That's not what I meant! It's just you have this unique aura about you that I would have remembered..."

"I see." Saruhiko glanced over his head when he felt eyes on them, noticing a group of young women glancing over at them. "If you find these events so fun, then why are you over here with me instead of dancing with a potential suitor?"

The prince grimaced slightly. "Oh right...dancing..." Yata mumbled.

"What? Do you not like it? Or are you so clumsy that you step on all the girl's toes?" He mocked him.

"I happen to be a pretty good dancer, thank you very much. It's just...whenever I dance with someone, they always take the opportunity to get too close and it makes me uncomfortable," he told him, so quiet that he could barely hear him.

He clicked his tongue. "Who would've thought that a prince wouldn't be able to handle a couple of girls..."

His remark was met with a glare. "Lets see how you like it when a bunch of girls are rubbing and squeezing your arms and trying to press their...their...ch-chests against you."

"Most men can only dream of having half as many women throw themselves at them so shamelessly."

"Just cause that's the kind of thing you fantasize about, doesn't mean it's something we all want," Yata shot back at him.

Another click. "I said most. I, myself, am not included in that. I find most girls annoying and airheaded...not that men are any better," he mused.

"You shouldn't talk that way about girls," he was chided.

"Says the one only speaking to me in order to avoid having to dance with said girls. If you really feel so strongly about them though then, be my guest, go ahead and keep one of them company instead."

"You're a real bastard, you know that?" The prince said with a scowl.

Saruhiko smirked a little. "Such a foul mouth."

"I'm a prince, I can talk however I want," he told him, though instead of holding the arrogance one would normally associate with those words, it held more of a light joking air.

"That you can. I suppose I just expected more of a prince. Shouldn't you have been tutored in conversation? Yet, somehow you've already shouted at me, flirted with me, spoken of women's breasts, and called me a bastard. Your tutors would cry if they heard you."

"I wasn't flirting with you," he protested, "and my tutors have long since given up on trying to control my mouth."

"Can't blame them." He took a sip from the glass of champagne.

Yata shot him a glare without any real animosity or heat behind it. "Whatever. I'm sure your mother probably would have a heart attack if she saw how bad your manners are."

Shrugging his shoulders slightly, he looked away. "I doubt that woman cares much about what I do or how I act," he told him calmly.

"Ah, I'm sorry." There was a tense edge to his voice, like he had just stepped on a landline and was waiting for it to blow.

"Don't be. I don't particularly care much about what she does either so I suppose that we are even," he said.

Yata remained silent. Looking back over at him, Saruhiko sighed when he saw the uncertain and mildly guilty look on his face. He reached out and put his hand on his head- hm, his hair was soft- causing Yata to look up at him.

"It's really not something that bothers me so don't look so guilty. If people see you looking like that then they might think that I did something bad to you."

Those hazel eyes stared at him, something unreadable passing through them. Had his actions really been so surprising that it left him completely speechless? Saruhiko pulled his hand away, dropping it back down by his side.

A lighthearted voice cut through the air, a hand resting on the prince's shoulder, pulling him from his stupor with a jolt. "Yata~ What are you doing over here? Shouldn't you be dancing?"

Saruhiko eyed the cheerful brunette who spoke so casually with the prince. He stayed silent, not wanting to further invite the man into their conversation. Truthfully, he wanted him to go away for more reasons than he could profess.

"I was just taking a break. He-," Yata nodded his head towards him, "-seemed like he wasn't feeling well, so I was checking on him and we got lost in conversation."

"I'm not sure if two dances warrants a break," the man teased with a fond smile. "Don't go putting my hours of training and bruised feet to waste."

Saruhiko's lips twitched up, almost unnoticeably. It was enough to warrant a small glare from the redhead before he responded.

"I won't. I promise. I'll find someone to dance with," he sighed. Yata gave a small nod towards Saruhiko before walking away with a small hunch in his shoulders.

"Poor kid... We've told him before that we don't have to have these kinds of parties, but he always insists that he'd rather deal with it than trouble our king with the rumors that would emerge if he wasn't looking for a suitor at his age," the man sighed as they both watched Yata awkwardly approach a blonde who seemed all too pleased to have gained his attention.

Saruhiko looked away, only seeing the man from the corner of his eye. "Should you be telling me something like that?" He drawled.

He smiled and shrugged in response. "Most likely, not. Yata seems to like you though, so I don't think he'd mind me telling you too much."

"I just keep the handsy girls away," he responded, clicking his tongue softly.

"If that was all he was looking for, he would spend the night hiding behind King like he used to or with the other men who live in the castle."

Saruhiko wasn't sure how to respond to that, so he merely shrugged. It didn't really matter to him, after all.

"You should enjoy yourself too, while you are here. If you don't know how to dance, I wouldn't mind showing you," the man offered. "It's really not that hard once you get the basics down."

He shook his head. "I'll have to decline," he said curtly.

The man smiled and nodded. "Suit yourself. I think our princess needs me so I must be going anyways," he said and began to walk away, heading up on of the stairways to the throne. Despite the man from before having disappeared, likely into the crowd to mingle, the cheerful guy walked around the throne to stand on the other side before leaning down and speaking quietly to the two royals.

It sent an uneasy chill up his spine that he promptly ignored. There was no way that they could know the true reason why he was here.

Instead of watching them, he returned his gaze to the dance floor where he quickly found the redhead. It seemed as if he hadn't been lying. Even from here, he could see the red on his cheeks as the woman pressed into him. He seemed to be barely touching her waist, more like letting his hand hover just close enough to maintain the illusion of contact.

Watching his obvious discomfort was a little bit amusing as it didn't seem to diminish in the slightest when he changed partners. This one was a brunette who seemed dedicated to trying to 'accidentally' kiss him at every possible opportunity, something that Yata managed to narrowly avoid each time.

Two more songs and two more partners. Each seemed more awful than the last, from where Saruhiko was standing. He almost felt bad for the shorter man when he watched a woman who seemed to be twice his age bring her mouth to his ear before licking it and saying something presumably crude. As the song ended, the woman seemed insistent to keep him for another. Placing his long empty glass down, he strode towards the pair, getting close enough to hear Yata's stuttered excuses as to why he was unable to dance with her again as well as her attempts to persuade him otherwise, gripping at his hand as he tried to pull away subtly.

Saruhiko slipped his hand between her's and Yata's, easily breaking the grip she had on him, pulling him towards himself and steadying him with a hand on his waist. He glowered at the startled woman with a look that was akin to how one might gaze at a bug who had just dirtied the bottom of their shoe. "Pardon the interference. It's not polite to selfishly keep the prince all to yourself now, don't you agree," he asked, not waiting for an answer before turning his attention to Yata. "Dance with me."

It wasn't a request, but Yata didn't seem to have any complaints. He merely nodded and allowed himself to be led away from the woman as the next song started. A complaint did arise when he realized that Saruhiko had no intentions of removing his hand from his waist.

"Why do I have to be the girl?" He asked with a small pout.

"It's because you are so small. Don't you think it would be odd if you were the one leading me?" Saruhiko responded, smirking when Yata glared at him.

Yata immediately protested. "I'm not that small! Besides, I don't know how to do the steps backwards."

"Well, it's a good thing I'm a great lead. Unless you want me to throw you back in the lions den, I suggest you place your hand on my arm," Saruhiko drawled.

Clearly not happy about it and grumbling something under his breath, he did as he was told. Moments later, Saruhiko began moving in the familiar steps of the dance, watching the other's eyebrows furrow as he tried to think about which way he would be moving next, his body tense in his hands. His hazel eyes went wide as they both felt Saruhiko's foot beneath his own. It wasn't enough to hurt, but it did draw an exasperated sigh from Saruhiko's lips.

He leaned in close, feeling Yata tense further as his lips got closer to his ear, likely expecting some sort of berating for his mess up. "Relax. Stop thinking and just trust me."

Hair brushed against his cheek slightly as Yata nodded and he pulled back, his eyes meeting Yata's as he began to move once more.

He gently applied pressure to his waist in order to guide him where he wanted him to go. The body beneath his touch seemed to relax slowly and his movements became equally as confident as Saruhiko's own. Their eyes never seemed to leave each other's as they moved and the music playing became mere background noise.

"Much better. You aren't as terrible as I suspected you'd be," Saruhiko mused.

Yata huffed out a laugh. "Same goes to you. I'm surprised a grumpy guy like you knows how to dance in the first place."

"Just because I dislike the activity, doesn't mean I'm unfamiliar with it." Though, he supposed a lot of his distaste for it came from how familiar he was with the movements. A familiarity that came with constant practice and fear of the sting of a wooden rod should he forget a step or not perform it the way that he should have.

For the first time since they had gotten into their rhythm, Yata glanced away from him. "I want to thank you...for helping me out back there. I'm not really good at saying no to girls and I really didn't want to dance with her again." He shuddered noticeably, no doubt recalling the experience.

Saruhiko clicked his tongue at him, feeling a bit unsure of how to respond to his gratitude. "Watching her basically violate you in the middle of everyone was unsettling my stomach, that's all. Besides, I suddenly felt like dancing and you seemed like the least disagreeable person," he told him.

"Can't you just accept my thanks like a normal person and say you're welcome?" Yata asked, looking back up at him as he sighed.

"Fine...you're welcome."

A grin appeared on the prince's lips. "See. That wasn't so hard, now was it?"

"It seems I've made a mistake. You are quite possibly the most annoying person I could have picked to dance with," he said.

That didn't seem to fade the grin the prince wore in the slightest. In fact, it almost seemed to make it grow even larger. "And you're the most depressing person I've ever danced with. I swear, is there anything you'll admit to enjoying?"

Saruhiko thought about that for a couple of moments. "I like crows and flowers."

"Of course you like something that when in groups is called a murder," Yata laughed, not noticing the way Saruhiko's eyes darkened slightly at the final word.

"I also like watching you," he added after a moment.

Amusement flickered through him at pink that colored the other's cheeks, those sparkling eyes looking up at him with surprise. He had said it with intentions of flustering him, but he hadn't been anticipating the warmth in his own chest at his reaction. He looked away from him, regaining his composure, not saying another word until the song came to an end when Yata broke the silence.

"Weren't you the one saying it was impolite to monopolize my attention?" He asked him, a playful smile on his lips when Saruhiko showed no intentions of letting go.

"I suppose it's a good thing that my manners are so atrocious then."

Yata laughed quietly. "There are probably going to be rumors after this, you know."

Rumors? There were far worse things that he would have to deal with after tonight. Silly rumors that may or may not be true depending on their contents were the least of his worries.

"Don't care. You should be more concerned about me ruining your reputation with rumors than the other way around," Saruhiko mused.

"I don't care either. Rumors don't bother me."

He hummed softly at his words. "That's not what your friend from earlier said. He said that rumors were the only reason you even have parties like this."

"Dammit Tatara..." Yata grumbled. "That's different. Those rumors would have burdened the King too," he insisted.

"And these wouldn't?" There was a small bubble of negative emotions when saw the split second of worry in his eyes.

Yata went to look towards the throne where the king sat, only for Saruhiko's movements to force him to face the opposite direction.

"You should only look at your partner," Saruhiko told him.

_'Don't talk about those other kids with me...I don't like it.'_

_'Huh? Is Saru jealous?'_

_'Shut up...'_

_'Don't worry! I'll make sure to only look at you from now on!'_

He ignored the memory. The familiar yet foreign voice that echoed in his brain, the flashes of a smile when he blinked.

Yata looked surprised for half a second before his expression softened. "...changed one bit..." he managed to make out from the words whispered under the red head's breath.

Arching his eyebrow in a silent question, he was completely ignored. He pursed his lips slightly.

"It's too late now. Even if I ignored you for the rest of the night, there would still be rumors," Yata told him.

Maybe it was his imagination, but he thought he felt the grip on his arm tighten ever so slightly.

"Perhaps we should give them something to start rumors about then." Saruhiko leaned in close, close enough that their breaths mingled with one another's.

A smirk slowly pulled his lips up when Yata flushed, though he didn't pull away. It made his heart quicken as what had only moments ago been a joke quickly became an actual possibility. Leaning forward and brushing his lips against the other's would be all too easy.

'I wonder what they'd feel like...what he would kiss like... has he ever been kissed before?'

Clicking his tongue, he pulled back to an appropriate distance, trying to ignore the fog that had settled over his brain, excusing it as an after effect of the alcohol he had consumed.

Letting go of him slowly, he stopped moving. "I think I drank too much. Is there somewhere I can get some fresh air?" Saruhiko asked.

"Yeah, I can take you out back to the garden. It'll be quiet there too," Yata said, grabbing onto his sleeve and pulling him through the crowd of people, trying not to gain any unwanted attention. Too late for that.

He led him down a long corridor and out a wooden door, the music beginning to fade behind them. As they walked towards rows of bushes and flowers so bright that he could make out their colors even in this low lighting, Yata let him go. Walking ahead of him to look at one of the flowers, red spider lilies, if his memory served him correctly. He crouched down, lightly stroked the thin petals with his thumb before looking up at Saruhiko.

_'Ne, Saru. When we are older, let's get married and plant a bunch of these, okay?'_

His heart tightened at the memory he couldn't place.

"These are one of my favorites, I had seen them in a book once before I came to live here and insisted to Kusanagi that we plant some," Yata told him with a small smile.

Saruhiko was a bit taken back by the reminder that the prince wasn't born into royalty. "Do you remember much of your life before you became a prince?" He asked.

Yata shook his head. "Not really. I remember my mother a bit...her smile and her reading to me...I remember another boy in the village who was my friend, the one that showed me the book with these flowers... that's all though. Everything else is pretty vague up until when Mikoto- eh King Mikoto took me in. I still don't understand why he did either, but I'm really grateful for it." There was an odd unreadable look on his face as he spoke of his friend. It was gone in an instant, replaced with admiration as he spoke of the king.

"I suppose anyone would be grateful for the upgrade from village kid to prince. Good food, respect, nice clothing. Must've been nice."

"I don't care about any of that stuff. Sure it's nice, but I'm just glad to have people who care about me. Even if King Mikoto was a dirt poor hermit who lived in a shack, I would be grateful to him for giving me a home," Misaki said as he looked back down at the flower.

Saruhiko hummed softly in acknowledgment. "What about your friend?"

He paused for a couple moments. "I miss him. I wished all the time on stars and dandelions that I'd be able to see him again, even if it was only in passing so that I'd know that he was okay."

"You say that in past tense. Do you not wish for that anymore?"

"There isn't any need to. My wish has already come true," he smiled at him.

He felt his chest get warm again at that smile. It annoyed him a little bit how his carefully crafted mask of ice was so easily being melted away by this boy's warmth. Annoyed him to the deepest bits of his core as he became filled with a sense of hesitation and doubt. His fingers twitched by his side. Saruhiko looked away, not saying a word.

A hand moving in his peripheral caught his attention. He looked back at Yata who was pulled his hand back, leaving a flower tucked behind Saruhiko's ear. "It's a kikyou. I thought it would look nice," he said, his cheeks a little bit red.

"You should be careful, Prince Yata," he said slowly, teasingly. "If you go giving flowers to people without knowing their meanings then you could give someone the wrong idea."

"Who said I don't know the meaning?" Was the response he got.

Saruhiko nearly choked on his own spit, disguising it quickly by clearing his throat. He held out his hand to him as the faint music from the castle changed. "I like this song, dance with me?"

"I thought you didn't like dancing," Yata said as he took his hand, not complaining this time as he rest an arm on Saruhiko's arm.

"I don't." He took the hand that was in his own and placed it on his shoulder, looking at Yata expectantly to adjust the other one on his own. Saruhiko rested his hands on his waist, pulling his body closer to his own.

When he was satisfied with their position, he began moving. It wasn't exactly the elegant movements of their last dance, in fact, there were barely any steps at all. There was something incredibly intimate about it though, having someone so close that they could undoubtedly hear his heartbeat if they leaned in ever so slightly. In that moment, he had a single thought that ran through him before he could forbid himself from even considering feeling such a thing.

'Please...don't let midnight come.'

The realization that he didn't want to do this was stronger than he could have imagined. Of course, he hadn't been particularly fond of the task to start out with. It was a hassle and a risk. Now though, he desperately didn't want to.

Consequences be damned, he wanted to say to hell with that man's instructions and just remain here, holding onto him like this until exhaustion made it impossible to stand any longer. There was a tiny shake of his hands as he let go of that silly thought, hopefully not noticeable. Even if it was, he could easily write it off as a result of the cool night air.

"Why did you come here tonight? You don't like events like this, you've made that pretty clear, and I can't imagine you are here to find someone to settle down with. So why?" Yata mumbled softly.

"I just came because I felt like it. Do you wish that I hadn't come? Would you prefer to be inside rather than out here with me?" He asked him, genuinely curious.

Yata shook his head slightly. "No. I'm glad you came. You're grumpy and a jerk, but I like talking to you. If you can, maybe you could come back sometime...you don't have to wait for another party either."

"I'll think about it."

"From you, I think that's about as good as a yes," Yata laughed, getting a soft tongue click in response. "Did you know that there is a legend about these gardens? Apparently, if two people kiss in the garden at midnight, then they are destined to love each other until they die."

Saruhiko raised an eyebrow. "Do you believe in that?" He asked him.

"I don't really know. I guess I don't really have any proof of it, but I've never met anyone who has tried it either."

"Not that. Love. Do you believe something like that really exists?"

Without missing a beat, Yata nodded. "Of course I do. Don't you?" There was something about the way he asked that tugged at his heartstrings.

He looked away from him. "No. But, I believe that if there was such a thing as love then it only serves to destroy people," he said. The memories of frightened screeches, silenced by a sickening crack crack crack crept up on him, clear as if the sound was happening before him again.

_'What's the matter? Why are you digging in the dirt?'_

_'Go away...'_

_'Sa-'_

_'I said leave me the hell alone!'_

Another fuzzy memory with that same voice. Why now was he remembering these things?

"That's not true!" Yata exclaimed.

"Why are you so defensive about it?"

He remained quiet for a couple of moments before speaking again, his voice soft and his eyes downcast. "Let's test it..."

"Test it? How do you suppose that we do that?" Saruhiko asked him, tilting his head ever so slightly to the side.

"At midnight, kiss me. If what they say about the garden is true then you'll have to believe in love, right?" Yata said, slowly looking up at him.

Every self preserving instinct inside of him cried out for him to push him away, to stop this silliness before things got any worse. Before that warm bubbly feeling in his chest grew. There was no way that he could go through with this. Surely, he was joking. Kissing a man he had just met, a man whose name he didn't even know...what kind of sane human being would suggest such a thing? Besides, there was a part of Saruhiko, a quiet locked away part that was otherwise known as his emotions, that wasn't sure if he could do what he needed to do if he let himself bow any further to Yata.

He opened his mouth, ready to launch an icy taunt at him that would hopefully take the idea off the table. "Whatever. It's just a kiss, after all. Only a virgin like you would think that love can stem simply from a kiss."

Damn.

That's not what he had intended to say.

"Bastard, do you have to take the magic out of everything."

"It's not my fault an idiot like you believes in things such as magic. Speaking of, why would you want to do something like this with me? Say that it does work...wouldn't that mean you'd be stuck with a bastard." Literally and figuratively.

The two of them had stopped moving, merely standing in one another's embrace. Saruhiko wasn't sure exactly when they had stopped or if Yata was even aware of it.

Yata seemed to be thinking carefully about his words, weighing them in his head. "There are worse people to be stuck with."

"There are better people as well. Don't tell me that you've fallen for me? Just because you are dancing the girl's part doesn't mean you have to have the heart of a maiden," he told him.

"Maybe I have..."

The strings of Saruhiko's heart were being played like a harp. Before he could stop himself, he brought a hand up to rest on Yata's cheek. "So, if I asked you to drop everything right now and run away with me, would you?"

If they ran away tonight, he could keep him safe. Take him somewhere far away where his father wouldn't be able to find them.

Yata stared up at him, mouth opening and closing a few times as he searched for words, his conflicting emotions clear on his face.

"Just as I thought," he let his hand fall and took a step backwards to put distance between them, trying to reinforce the cracks in his armor.

"I-I couldn't just leave everyone without a word. They're my family...besides, you could just stay here. There wouldn't be any reason to run away," there was a hint of desperation in his voice that Saruhiko both did and didn't understand.

Why was he so desperate to keep a man he barely knew close? How could he claim to have fallen for him so soon? Isn't that just a superficial love?

So hypocritical.

Wasn't he the one that had just asked him to run away with him? He had been completely ready in that second to throw away his mask and leave his life behind, had already been prepared to find hand blistering work to give him a happy life. Saruhiko barely knew him, but he had been prepared to risk it all in those few moments.

He clicked his tongue. "I was just teasing you anyway, don't take it so seriously." His tone was flat and devoid of any emotion excluding a small bit of exasperation.

"If you were just teasing me...then why did you look so disappointed...?"

Had he?

_Ding._

The bell chimed and Saruhiko's heart dropped into his gut.

_Ding._

He reached out and took the collar of his jacket into his hand, pulling him closer again.

_Ding._

The fingers of his left hand slipped under his chin, lifting it up so that their eyes met. "Shut up."

_Ding._

"W-Wait-"

"You wanted to kiss me, right?"

_Ding._

"Well, yes, but-"

"Then shut up and kiss me."

_Ding._

Saruhiko leaned down, watching as Yata's eyes fluttered closed, his lips parted slightly in anticipation.

_Ding._

He felt the cool metal as he slipped it into his trembling right hand. Gripping it tightly enough to hurt.

_Ding._

His own eyes fell shut as he closed the tiny gap between them.

_Ding._

There was a tingle of electricity that ran through him when their lips met and he nearly lost himself.

_Ding._

Nearly. That awful reminder flickered in the back of his mind.

_Ding._

He slowly pulled back from the kiss, looking down at Yata who seemed blurry despite how close their faces were.

_Ding._

"I told you. Love only serves to destroy people." He was practically screaming at himself to stop, but his hand moved on its own, plunging the dagger into his stomach.

Yata's face contorted into a mixture of surprise and pain. He reached down, touching the red liquid that had begun blossoming from his skin, permanently staining the white of his clothes. His body slumped against Saruhiko's as he started losing strength.

Slowly, he lowered him to the ground, kneeling beside him. He tried to blink away the blurriness in his eyes, wanting to be able to see his face properly.

"You're crying..." Yata whispered softly, reaching up with a trembling hand to wipe at his cheek.

Crying...there was no way he could be. He hadn't cried since he was a child. Yet, when he reached up to place his hand against Yata's, he felt the wetness there. He was crying. Saruhiko wiped at his eyes, the salty liquid soaking into his sleeve. When he looked back at Yata, he was overcome with frustration at what he saw.

He was smiling at him. Smiling at him while looking at him with those gentle eyes. "What the hell? Stop looking at me like that, you damn idiot. Glare at me, curse at me, hate me. Just stop looking at me like that," he practically begged, grimacing at how pathetic he probably sounded.

"But I'm happy cause I was right..."

Saruhiko looked at him, confused. "Right? What do you mean you were right?"

His face was slowly draining of color. "I'm going to love you until I die...that means what they say about the garden is true..." he mumbled.

"You really are an idiot..." Saruhiko said in disbelief.

"So are you...I kept waiting, but even now you don't recognize me, do you Saru?"

Saru... how did he know his name? He had never even told him his last name so how did he know his first? His eyes slowly widened as it began to dawn on him. His breath caught in his throat, a choked noise.

"Misaki..."

"You finally got it...you were always the one wanting me to look at only you...but you couldn't even see me when I was right in front of you," Misaki said, though he didn't sound too upset. Tired and almost a little teasing, but not upset.

It wasn't that he hadn't recognized him, more like he had blocked his existence out. When his Misaki had disappeared from his life, vanishing like a wisp of smoke without anything to remember him by except the memory of an unfulfillable promise, it had been too painful to bear. So he locked those memories up, forced them down before they could destroy him. How ironic that they might have been the only thing that could have saved him. A bitter laugh fell from his lips at the thought.

He reached down, placing his hand on Misaki's chest so that he could feel his slowing heart beat. "I see you now."

"Good...stay with me?"

His words were so quiet now, as if he didn't have the strength to speak above a whisper.

Saruhiko nodded without a word. Slowly, he used his free hand to strip the masks from both of their faces. The ribbon in his hair was loose now and he could feel strands of his hair falling from it. He couldn't couldn't bring himself to care much about fixing it. Instead, he focused his attention onto Misaki's face, soaking in each detail that he could. He had grown so much, matured so much. It was almost hard to believe that it was the same hotheaded kid who used to follow him around, clinging to him and saying his name so sweetly until he eventually started looking forward to it.

He leaned down and gently pressed his lips against his forehead, hearing a soft shaky exhale of breath as he did. When he pulled back, he realized he could no longer feel the light thumping against his hand and the twinkle in Misaki's eyes had faded.

Saruhiko's entire body shuddered as a pathetic noise similar to the whimper of a kicked dog ripped from his throat. "Misaki? Misaki....Misaki!" His hand curled into a fist, clutching at his jacket as he shook him. His name repeated over and over, a soft plea. "Come on Misaki...I just got you back. Misaki...Misaki...-"

•_•_•_•_•_•_•_•_•_•_•_•_•_•_•_•_•_•_•_•_•_

"Misaki!"

The choked cry tore from him as he shot up, his fingers curled to cling desperately to something that wasn't there. Sweat was making the hair on his forehead tacky and causing his clothes to cling to him. His eyes were wide and tears were shamelessly spilling from them.

"Mmm...what're you yellin' 'bout?" A sleepy voice pulled his attention to his right where he saw a small figure rub at his eyes, twisting to pull at the string of the lamp beside him before his hazel eyes came to land on the panicked man beside him. Immediately, his gaze become soft and he seemed much more awake. "Saru...what's wrong?"

He opened his mouth but no words came out as he grabbed onto him and pulled him into his chest, burying his face into the side of his neck; the strong steady beat of his pulse slowly soothing his own erratic heart. Misaki stroked his damp hair lightly, cooing soft words of comfort to him that Saruhiko didn't even really process. He was just glad that Misaki was here in his arms, talking and breathing. When he was calm and had stabled himself to the point where he would be able to speak properly, he pulled back.

"Sorry..."

"Why are you apologizing? It's not like you did anything wrong. Let's take a shower and go back to bed, okay?"

"Okay."

**Author's Note:**

> Look. I couldn't commit to suffering. 
> 
> I wrote it as Misaki actually dying, Saruhiko having to leave and Misaki living but Saruhiko not finding out till later after Niki dies (well I started to), and as the dream. 
> 
> I wanted to keep this as a relatively short one shot with mostly angst, but I like happy endings so it was a dream. Maybe one day I'll fully write out the second option and make that an optional part two or something. Who knows?


End file.
